ADC,09

9. Breaking Point

Constant abuse will drive anybody to their wits end. The results vary considerably as does the length of time it takes for someone to snap. At some point even the most timid boy will turn and fear is replaced by rage - jp

Buster was a different kind of a bully to Harris and Joel could almost tolerate it.... almost. Unlike Harris the bullying from Buster was indiscriminate. He had a couple of cronies but in general Buster regarded everybody with equal contempt. The form of bullying by Buster was quite impromptu and the recipient random. It had been established by now that Joel was quite tough. Buster thought of himself as the toughest boy in their year so he naturally wanted to put Joel to the test. In truth it was probably Carrots but he had nothing to prove.
"Champion!!" Buster declared as he won yet another game of knuckles.

Joel watched the beaten boy rubbing the back of his hands. He had never played knuckles and Buster eyed him up. Buster wanted to play the game with another boy but there was a marked reluctance to challenge him.
"How about you Phillips, you don't look scared" Buster taunted.

He had said it in such a way Joel would find it hard to refuse. The last time the pair clashed resulted in Joel coming off better, if the subsequent caning by Dinosaur was overlooked.
"Okay"

The boys put their fists together. The idea was when contact was broken the 'hitter' would try and rap the back of the other boy's knuckles. If he missed then the other boy would have a turn as hitter. If contact was made the hitter would have another go until he missed. The bout was over when one boy backed out. Buster hit Joel every time. Joel's knuckles were red raw but he kept going, refusing to admit defeat. In the end Buster was hurting himself hitting Joel, and he was clearly expecting his opponent to give up. Joel wouldn't concede and it was the bell that eventually saved both boys. Buster respected Joel a little because of the way he stood up to him, but it didn't mean he would leave the boy alone.

Joel's flippant attitude during classes brought him into conflict with several teachers, although he behaved impeccably for Dinosaur. Dinosaur had caned Joel more than any other teacher but it had been weeks since the last time. There was even talk of Joel helping with a special assignment in the photography club next term when the emphasis shifted from war to sport. Joel's excitement wasn't shared by Herman who was also pencilled in.

Campbell was a problem verbally but the Geography teacher Cratchett was worse. Cratchett never actually caned Joel but he did hurl a few choice missiles at the boy. He was a good shot as well. Chalk frequently bounced off Joel's head when he lost concentration through Buster kicking his chair, or some other nuisance. A couple of times when Joel had smart-mouthed Cratchett, the teacher had hurled the blackboard rubber at the boy. It wasn't too bad if the chalky cushioned part hit, but if the wooden side caught Joel it hurt a lot. He had it bounce off his rib-cage once but the worst time was when it hit his knuckles and a lump came up that didn't go down for weeks.

Cratchett could be quite inventive too. He would make Joel stand at the front of the class and hold out a heavy book at arms length. Next to where Joel stood was a radiator and to gain some respite Joel would rest his hand on the radiator. The weight of the book on Joel's hand against the hot radiator caused a different kind of pain and Cratchett chuckled to himself as he watched the boy out of the corner of his eye. Joel hated it when Cratchett wandered around the class, especially if he was carrying something. A blow would come from out of the blue whether it was with a stack of books, a ruler, or some other weapon, and it was hard to prepare against.

Harris saw Joel as a threat to his dominance within the Lodge. It simply wouldn't do for a prole to show such a lack of fear and respect. Joel had become wise to Harris and managed on the whole to keep out of his way. There was trouble brewing though and Joel knew it. He felt like turning to attack as a means of defence. Harris was considerably bigger but Joel wasn't scared of him on his own. The trouble was he never seemed to be alone. Joel didn't realise that by avoiding Harris he was putting others in danger, not least Herman and Richards.

Christmas was coming. Joel would see his father for the first time in a year, and needed his friends more than ever right now.

* * * * *

It was a relief to finally escape the school. Joel had been on edge for the last week as Harris stepped up his hate campaign. Thankfully the abuse had just been verbal with Harris unable to get Joel alone. The verbal abuse was okay as it was more humiliating than painful. Joel could handle that, after all it's not like he was ever going to be popular.

There was the worry of the threats. Harris would draw a finger across his throat when he saw Joel in the time worn death threat. It kept Joel on his toes. Showers were the biggest danger and Joel's new found self-consciousness made him even more vulnerable to attack. He was no longer comfortable showering with Herman even though the boy hadn't said anything untoward. Joel didn't mind showering with boys who were also late to mature but there were fewer and fewer in his year.

Kramer was the only boy Joel was comfortable with, but he usually had Carrots on hand. To get caught in the showers by Harris would be painful, so a couple of times Joel skipped them. It was noticed and the writing of two pages as a punishment were nothing compared to the 'smelly' or 'stinky' taunts. It just seemed Joel couldn't do anything right and the slightest lapse would be picked up on, giving his peers more ammunition.

Joel had learnt to control his temper a little and it hadn't gone unnoticed it was now rare he attacked his tormentors, choosing to ignore the taunts. The result was even more abuse, and from boys previously too scared to say anything. Joel had given up trying to stop boys teasing him, he was tired. Being on high alert all the time was taking its toll. The fight was draining the life from the boy. Sullen and reclusive, Joel was becoming anonymous, a ghost almost. The school felt like a prison and the days until his release were counted down. On any day Joel could tell you exactly how many days were left until the next school holidays.

A weird thing happened as awaited his bus home. Joel cried. Not just a case of tears welling up, but huge racking sobs. It was like a release valve had been triggered and interspersed with the sobs was laughter. Was he losing his mind?

Joel's father had returned from The Falklands soon after Joel had gone back to school and went away again after a couple of weeks leave. He was still at sea when Joel returned home but was due back before Christmas. Almost as a ritual Joel tore his hated uniform off and sought his bed. Burying his face in the pillow the scent was heady. School bedding could never smell or feel the way his pillows and bedsheets did at home. Joel climbed into bed. The wintry weather was no good for football and the only ones he wanted to call on were Scott or Jodie who lived furthest away. Joel fell into a deep peaceful sleep the like of which he never had at school.

A knock at the door woke Joel. He looked out the window and saw the rain had stopped. At the door stood Jamie, Ashley, Mattie, and Xander. He waved them in and grabbed his mother's dressing gown from the bathroom to cover himself. It was soft and warm.... and pink! Ashley laughed when he saw Joel coming down the stairs in the pink dressing gown.
"Told you that school would make him into a girl"
"You and him can get married" Xander said joining in.
"Girls don't marry girls you idiot" Mattie snorted.
"Hey!!!" Joel complained then smiled and dived from the stairs onto his friends.

Jamie had side-stepped as the others crashed to the floor in a heap and a free-for-all developed. Joel broke it up quickly before anything was smashed. Catching up on the latest news from the village was the best thing ever. The news wasn't brilliant, nor particularly interesting, but it was things Joel could identify with and relate to. Most important it was related to him by boys who genuinely liked him, who had come round to call for him. FRIENDS!

Alan had his cast off and was the first boy to have a girlfriend, something which drew a mixed reaction from the other boys. Nathan was having a really rough time but Xander and Mattie watched out for him best they could. He looked gaunt and dark circles were round his eyes. Joel frowned.
"They're talking about strikes at the pit" Jamie said adding to the gloom.

The boys were only young when the last strikes went on, but they knew of the accompanying hardship and fell silent.
"What are we doing tomorrow then?" Joel asked cheerfully to brighten the mood, he loved that WE word.
"Football" was Ashley's typical response.
"Hunting" Mattie said equally predictably and Jamie thought a moment.
"Hunting or football" he said with a distinct lack of imagination.
"We could play war" Xander put in.

An animated debate followed as the boys argued what would be the best thing to do. Joel just sat and watched, smiling.
"What are you grinning at?" Xander asked noticing the look on Joel's face.
"You lot, it's just so good to see you all again"

The boys looked at each other. The looks on their faces clearly indicated they thought Joel had gone mad.
"Told you he was a girl, get him" Ashley said and started another free-for-all.

Joel had to get them out of the house before they wrecked the place. The boys decided they would go hunting when the weather turned. There was no point if it was wet, dry frosty weather was best. It was a toss up between football and war, so they decided to wait to see how many boys turned up. Joel didn't care what they did just as long as they did it with him. As the boys left Mattie hung back a moment and looked at Joel strangely.
"Are you okay?" he asked.
"Of course" Joel replied a little puzzled.
"It's just that... oh never mind"
"Say what you mean" Joel told the boy.

Mattie thought for a moment then sighed.
"It's just that your eyes look like Nathan's"
"I'm okay, honest" Joel assured his friend, he hadn't even noticed the black rings around his eyes.

Mattie ran off to catch the others up and Joel closed the door. He went upstairs and looked in the bathroom mirror slightly worried. It was the first time Joel had looked in a mirror for months and he wondered how long the dark circles had been there.

The boys played war with their pellet pistols the next day and it was good to see Alan again. Joseph and Lawrence were becoming permanent fixtures but Joel still missed Scott and Jodie. Nathan seemed a bit happier but Joel saw what Mattie meant. Joel liked Nathan although he wasn't as close to him as with the others. It puzzled Joel why Nathan should tell him about the problems at home. Perhaps the others were too close, or maybe he sensed Joel was a better listener and wouldn't judge him.

Joel was about to have some problems of his own. The only other birds the boys hunted apart from pheasant were pigeons. As they walked back from the woods a pigeon flew overhead and Joel without thinking took a pot-shot with his air-pistol. He knew he never had a chance of hitting it but what Joel didn't calculate was where the pellet would come down. The pellet hit the windscreen of a parked car and shattered it.

The boys ran off in every direction but Joel froze. The owner saw him and marched Joel home. Joel's mother told the man to get the windscreen fixed and she would pay for it. The man had barely left the house when Joel's mother set about him. Normally Joel wasn't too bothered about being hit by his mother, but she was hitting him with the gun and it hurt like hell. When one hit opened a cut over Joel's eye and the blood seemed to bring his mother back to her senses.

It seemed odd to Joel how his mother would injure him then tend to his wounds, and he winced as the dreaded TCP came out again. He hated the fiery anti-septic liquid more than the actual injuries.
"Wait until your father gets home tomorrow" his mother threatened.

Joel's mother may have been tending his wounds but she was still angry. The cut now paled into insignificance when Joel thought about his father's belt. Frequent canings at school held no fear for Joel but his father's belt was different. It had been a while since the last time but the memory was vivid. The offending gun was thrown in the bin but Joel retrieved it when his mother went to bed. He wrapped the gun in an old T-shirt and hid it under the garden shed.

The next day Joel wasn't allowed out with his friends and had to go with his mother to see his grandmother. Joel had other things on his mind, his father was due at anytime. Like a condemned man Joel moped around and the attempts of his grandmother to cheer him up fell way short of the mark. Seeing his father for the first time in a year should have been a happy reunion, but Joel didn't even look at the man as he walked through the door. Hugs, smiles, and greetings were heaped on Joel's father by the womenfolk and uncle Tom shook his hand. Joel sat frowning. Suddenly school didn't seem so bad.
"What's your problem?" Joel's father asked gruffly.

The whole sorry tale of the windscreen was related to Joel's father who listened intently. Joel felt the blood draining from his face and his father took his arm leading him out the back door. Resigned to his fate Joel didn't even struggle as his father took him into the shed and took his belt off. Joel just looked blankly at his father as though his spirit was crushed, and the will to live was ebbing away.

Joel's father wasn't a heartless man. He just didn't know how to show emotion, having been the man of the family and main provider from fourteen years old. It must have hurt him to be Santa Claus or the Devil incarnate when seeing his son after such a long period. He looked at Joel who stood before him staring blankly into space.
"I'll hit the bench and you yell" he whispered.
"I can't"
"If you don't I'll have to belt you for real" Joel's father warned.

For reasons unknown, Joel couldn't bring himself to go along with the charade, he turned round and bent over. Joel's father grabbed his arm and pulled him round hugging the boy. It was the only time Joel could ever remember being hugged by his father and he just stood impassively with his arms by his side, a single tear running down his cheek.

* * * * *

Christmas hadn't been brilliant and birthdays at boarding school were fruitless. Joel had told his parents not to send a parcel because they often went missing. In truth, he was ashamed to open it in front of the other boys. The parcel came nevertheless. Joel opened it cautiously, as the other boys gathered round to see.

Joel's eyes lit up when he saw the collection of items he needed for school. The calculator being the centre-piece. Calculators were a requirement for every boy. Joel had lied saying he lost his on the train but he had never owned one. All his calculations were done long-hand but Joel didn't care. Numbers and statistics rolled around in Joel's head all the time.
"What on earth is that?" a voice came from behind him.
"Don't scoff, his mother has bought him a valuable antique" another said and laughter erupted.

There was of course the other problem Joel had with his birthday falling during term time. Harris as a third year had no business getting involved in the traditional bumps but he had a whole term without any retribution for his bullying and now it was getting out of hand. The day before Joel's thirteenth, one of the proles had wet his bed and was in the shower room washing his sheets when Harris walked in with his two lap-dogs.
"Look chaps, another little pissant!" he declared.

The boy carried on rinsing out his sheet not daring to look at the three bullies. Harris grabbed him roughly and pushed him back into the shower area. The prole sat back hard quivering in the corner with the three bullies boxing him in. They didn't see Herman enter the shower room. With the bullies preoccupied Herman turned the showers on. All the nozzles sprang to life making the bullies jump back as the jets hit them. Harris just saw Herman's figure disappearing through the door.

That night three shadowy figures crept into Herman's room. He woke to a pillow being pushed hard in his face and blows raining down on his body. Herman's room mates kept their eyes tight shut as the assault continued for a couple of minutes. They hit Herman everywhere on the body only the pillow muffling his cries of pain. Exhausted and suffocating Herman's body relaxed in spite of the blows and then it was over. The next morning Joel was ready for a shower but didn't see Herman so went to his room.
"Come on lazy, get up, it's my birthday!" Joel said cheerfully.

Herman tried to pull the bed sheets back and winced in pain. Joel saw something was wrong and pulled the covers back. Herman's body was covered in red marks, soon to become bruises, and Herman found it painful to move.
"Harris!" Joel spat out angrily.
"I think so, but I can't be sure" Herman said grimacing.
"Who the hell else would it be?" it was obvious even though Joel didn't know about the incident with the prole in the shower.

The pain in Herman's ribs was intolerable and after an initial refusal, he relented and went to see Matron. As a precaution he was sent to hospital for an X-ray. Joel was allowed to go with him and kept Herman company during the long wait for the results. Nothing was broken but back at school Herman was given three days in sick bay with severe bruising. He was naturally questioned but refused to say what happened. Joel was worried. With Herman out of the way he suspected Harris would come after him. Joel guessed what was going to happen and when. It was almost inevitable Harris would involve himself with Joel's birthday bumps in some way.

All evening Joel was on edge and eventually his fears were realised. Joel saw Harris and company coming but there was little he could do.
"Ah the birthday boy" Harris declared with deceptively good humour.
"It's nothing to do with you Harris" Joel snarled as menacingly as he could manage.
"Just a bit of harmless fun Phillips" Harris said pleasantly but it was for the benefit of others and his smile didn't reach his eyes.
"I've seen the result of your harmless fun, Herman is in sick-bay because of it"
"I really do not know what on earth you are implying" Harris said and grabbed Joel's jaw roughly then under his breath "You shouldn't be at this school and I will make your life hell"
"Leave him alone!" a voice piped up and Harris saw Richards standing defiantly with clenched fists.

Harris looked at the prole who had the gall to confront him.
"Perhaps we should toss Phillips and his girlfriend together" Tyrell sniggered.
"My name is Richards" the boy said angrily.
"Richards, yes. I will make sure of remembering that name" Harris said pointedly.

The commotion brought the Shep from his room and he surveyed the scene.
"What the hell is going on?" he demanded then he saw Harris and looked at the floor.
"Harris wants to toss Richards with me and it's not even his birthday" Joel said hoping the Shep would intervene or at least oversee the bumps.
"Harris shouldn't even be tossing him" Richards put in.
"Richards keep out of what doesn't concern you. Harris get it over with, and quickly" the Shep said and went back inside his room closing the door.

The Shep had effectively washed his hands of the whole affair and now Joel was at the mercy of Harris and his cronies. Joel lay on the blanket and Harris, Tyrell, and Stone picked a corner each. Richards went to pick up the remaining corner but was pushed away roughly by Stone.
"Proles do not toss they are too weak!" he snarled.

None of Joel's classmates stepped forward for the last corner and Harris looked around. As his eyes went to each boy in turn they looked at the floor.
"I"ll take the other end" Collins said looking sternly at Harris.

For a moment it seemed Harris would object but he just shrugged and Joel was relieved. He knew Collins wasn't scared of Harris, even though he minded his own business and kept himself to himself.
"Very well" Harris said jovially "Collins it is then"

The first ten bumps were boisterous but nothing Joel couldn't cope with. He was worried though because he knew Harris would do something mean. Sure enough on the next toss, when Joel came down the bullies didn't hold the blanket taut enough and he touched the floor which was not supposed to happen. Collins glared at the bullies. It was enough for Tyrell and Stone to take a tighter grip on the twelfth descent. Harris didn't hold the blanket any tighter though. Joel didn't hit the floor but the tilt of the blanket made him roll towards Harris.
'Just one more' Joel thought with relief.

As he came down for the final time Harris let go of his end. The others held their corners but it did nothing to break Joel's fall and he crashed heavily onto the floor from ceiling height. Joel lay motionless with his eyes closed. Everyone looked accusingly at Harris who gave a hurt look.
"What? He was too close, I had all the weight. What could I do?" he bleated with feigned innocence.

Richards flew at Harris fists flailing, swearing at the bully. The slightly built prole had neither the physique nor the know-how to inflict any damage on Harris but the ferocity of the attack surprised him and Stone had to drag Richards away.
"RICHARDS!" screeched the Shep "Profanity, Headmaster's study tomorrow after breakfast"

The three bullies quickly skulked away.
"What happened?" the Shep asked looking at Joel in a crumpled heap on the floor.

He was conscious but the wind had been taken out of him. Willy had seen what happened and scowled at the Shep, the other boys dispersed so as not to be questioned.
"What the f-" Richards started to say but Collins put a hand over the boy's mouth and led him away before he got himself into more trouble.

Willy knelt down and bent over his room-mate.
"Can you hear me?" Willy asked softly.

Joel opened his eyes and tried to answer that he was in fact fine but could only manage a croak. If it hadn't been for the fact Joel couldn't talk, he wouldn't even have gone to the sick bay. The wind had been taken out of him, nothing more. Willy insisted, worried about Joel's inability to speak. Herman was shocked to see Joel come into sick bay. Matron looked Joel over but he hadn't hit his head and there were no marks. Joel's voice started to come back and he assured her he was fine. Nevertheless Matron let him sleep in sick bay with Herman that night.
"Perhaps we should stay out of his way" Herman suggested dejectedly.
"Then he's won" Joel argued.
"It's not a game you moron; he will never stop" Herman said close to tears.

For Herman's sake Joel didn't argue. He didn't realise the affect it was having on Herman and felt ashamed. After all it wasn't even Herman's fight, he only became involved by looking out for Joel. Joel began to think Herman was right but suspected Harris would thrive on their capitulation. With a day off the following day, Herman and Joel missed the Head's speech about bullying. Joel also missed the illicit game of football. As he prepared to leave the sick bay, Richards came in. His nose was bleeding and he had a fat lip. Joel waited as he watched Matron tend to the boy. When she left the room for a minute Joel nudged Richards.
"Harris?" he asked softly.

Richards nodded and put a finger to his lips.
"The Head never caned me because I was deemed to be in shock due to your injury. Tyrell and Stone dragged me into the copse when I was walking back to the Lodge. Harris said if the Head refused to beat me then justice must be served by someone else"

The door to the next room was open and the boys didn't see Matron behind the door listening to every word. Richards told how Harris had taken a branch from a bush as a makeshift cane.
"But what happened to your face?" Joel asked.
"I kicked him in the balls" Richards whispered.

Harris snapped and set about the boy two years his junior. Joel could feel the rage building up inside, it was all his fault. Everything was his fault, first Dean, then Herman, and now Richards. Joel stormed out of the building just as Matron came in. Striding purposefully to the Lodge Joel picked up a large stone on the way. He went to the games locker in the changing rooms and smashed the padlock off with the stone. Joel opened it up and took out a cricket bat. Hiding it half down his trousers and half up his shirt, Joel smuggled the bat back to his room.

Long after lights out Joel kept himself awake. When he felt he could stay awake no longer, Joel slid from his bed and took up the cricket bat. Opening the door to Harris' room Joel stole towards the bully's bed, his breathing was even. Joel's heart was pounding so hard he felt sure Harris would hear it and wake up. Joel took a deep breath then started battering Harris as hard as he could with the cricket bat.

Harris was squealing like a stuck pig and begging Joel to stop, but a red mist had descended and Joel completely lost control. The lights came on but still Joel hit the blanket covered form of the shrieking bully. Dinosaur came and dragged Joel away in the end, the Shep had roused him being too scared to get involved himself. Joel was put in a locked room at the end of the dormitory for the rest of the night and Harris was taken away to hospital with suspected broken bones.

The next day Joel received his first public flogging. Six of the best over the Headmaster's desk in assembly. In an act of defiance, Joel turned to shake hands with the Headmaster afterwards but was ignored. It caused a rumbling undercurrent among the boys in assembly. Joel was sent home and suspended for two weeks, pending a committee meeting with a view to expulsion. He didn't know whether to be happy or worried.

Perhaps Joel's luck was changing. His father was away which saved a hiding, although when his mother went to bingo on his first night home, he found himself sleeping in the phone box again. Joel's escapades at school came back to his mother via a letter. Naturally it didn't tell the whole story and Joel wasn't allowed to. He had brought shame on the family and that was that. It felt to Joel like he was sliding into an abyss.

Harris had a series of lumps and bumps, mainly on the arms, and a hair-line fracture of a finger. He was in sick bay for a week. The school board met to discuss Joel's fate and damning reports about Harris were forthcoming from Matron, the Shep, and somewhat surprisingly, Dinosaur. It was clear to the board, the nature of Harris and Joel's frequent trips to sick bay were linked. The committee decided the suspension was enough due to 'mitigating circumstances' which they didn't specify. Both Joel and Harris were put on probation until the end of the school year.

Joel could have done cartwheels. It meant Harris would have to keep his nose clean until the beginning of the next school year when he would move to Gatehouse, the boarding house for fourth years upwards. Both Herman and Richards were grateful of the respite as well. Joel was glad for Herman and Richards but 'keeping his nose clean' may not be so easy. He found when one door opens another slams in his face. For now Joel was enjoying his impromptu holiday.

When Joel told his friends about Harris and what happened they all laughed. With the possible exception of Nathan they would have done similar. Certainly Jamie, Ashley, and Scott would have, Unlike the boys at Forester, they didn't find Joel's behaviour at all shocking. Harris made it clear he wouldn't fight fair so he had it coming. Joel hoped it would be the end of the matter but Harris had lost a lot of credibility. The boys in the dormitory heard Harris screaming when Joel was beating him, all of a sudden the bully seemed less fearsome. Harris wouldn't let that pass easily.

Playing football with his friends brought back fond memories of a time that felt so long ago now. If he could take his 11+ exams again would Joel have deliberately failed? Always in the back of his mind was Harris, and Joel wondered how the bully would react on his return.

It didn't take long to find out. The other boys had ribbed Harris mercilessly whilst Joel was suspended and he had been very subdued. As soon as Joel walked into the dormitory it began again. It wouldn't have been so bad but the other boys, possibly fed up with Harris and his malevolent ways, couldn't resist making comments.
"Hear you are signing up for cricket next term Phillips" one said.
"Yes, he swings a mean bat!" another chipped in and Harris scowled.

The boys weren't doing Joel any favours antagonising Harris. When nobody was looking Harris moved his finger across his throat as he glared at his assailant. Kramer's voice came from behind Joel:
"Don't worry about him" he said seeing the gesture.
"I'm not worried" Joel said cockily but his stomach was churning.

Joel reasoned whatever Harris had in mind would be severe, considering the scale of the beating he took. Harris turned and went to his room. Kramer had put his arm around Joel's shoulder in a show of solidarity. It was just as well. The fight seemed to have gone out of Herman and apart from Dinosaur's extra-curricular photography classes, Joel rarely saw him to speak to at any length.

Rugby was Joel's outlet. The school team had started living up to expectations at last and put a winning sequence together. School house won the inter-house trophy as was usual and it felt good to be on a winning team. It was the only time Joel felt as if he belonged in this alien environment.

Fortunately Harris kept his distance although the threatening gestures didn't let up. Joel was touched by Kramer's show of support and their common affliction brought them closer together. In spite of Joel's doubts about Kramer he convinced himself his new friend was cut from a different cloth to Harris. Joel began to overlook the way Kramer teased other boys. It was as though Kramer was insecure about his slight stature and felt the need to make others feel small. Joel was still reluctant to run with the pack.

Hanging back for showers after practice was when the two boys talked most. Kramer's knowledge of matters carnal seemed to be second to none in their year. Joel doubted most of the stories but he finally learnt the mechanics of sex. Even though he knew Alan had a girlfriend in the village, Joel couldn't believe any girl their age would do what Kramer was describing. Kramer's stories just seemed too incredible, but they were entertaining. It did make Joel think of Jodie but he certainly couldn't imagine her doing the things Kramer spoke of, even if he had the courage to suggest it.

With being on probation Joel was unable to sneak out of the school grounds which gave him more time to study. So although he continued to be a source of amusement to his classmates, very few teachers had any complaints about Joel's industry. As the term drew to a close Joel had worked his way into the top three in most of his subjects. At least his reception at home might be more benign, even taking into consideration the suspension.

For the first and only time Joel was almost sad the term had to end. Rugby season was over and neither cross-country nor cricket appealed, contrary to the comments about Joel's bat wielding prowess.